Category: Uncategorized

Keeping up

Keeping up is hard, especially now.  Since my Dad passed away I have not felt like doingmuch, but life must go on.  I go to work, come home, feed my family, wash their clothes and go to bed, only to get up and do it all over again.  Having said that- friends and family have been good.  James has been very good.  I get a little frustrated with him from time to time, him not giving me some space, or expecting me to do this or that, but he has been very good.  Katie has been good also- although she must know something is up and her sleep patterns are all disturbed.

Kate is “doing her thing” and i hope she will be able to help with Dad’s house as soon as she is allowed.

I am taking care of the paperwork stuff and that’s okay by me.  It’s a little frustrating as I seem to encounter issues no matter what it is I am trying to do.  It’s amazing that some people give you a hard time because you are trying to give them money.

I am finding more and more that i just need some downtime.  i want to get a massage – or just lay and read- somethingrelaxing.  I am truly overwhelmed with the looming task of taking care of his business.  This will more than likely be a processthat will take more than a year.



The Sun - Tarot Necklace - Carnivale Mystickal
found this while surfing plus size clothes online- it was for sale- thru etsy- on a website exclusively for plus size goth wear.  I was not so enamored of the clothing- I’m not much into goth- but the jewelry was amazing.  I want this!!

pity party

Hey there.  I can’t believe i don’t blog more.  It’s the perfect place to hold all those conversations that i usually have inside my head. 

Having said that- i am having a little pity party for myself today.  I’m tired because Katie keeps waking up in the middle of the night and i am the only one who can/will get up to tend to her.  lately she has been getting hungry at night- i am not sure we are making sure she eats enough for dinner- or has an appropariate bed-time snack.

She really is growing up too.  I can’t believe it, just amazing!


so much for that

Wow.  Back in April I was going to try to blog more- and I got that one entry in.

So many times I think about stuff that I should blog about.  Maybe just to get off my chest- but maybe to see if anyone wants to chime in on whats going through my head.  I have to admit that I like an outside perspective sometimes- I have a habit of being a  little narrow-minded or maybe melodramatic sometimes and I need a little reality check, a little grounding.

So I am hoping to blog more.  And unfortunately – for now- it might be a bit whiney.  Feel free to tell me to get over it, or not.

time for some updates

Okay- so it’s been a while since I last posted, much has happened but mostly stuff I got moody about and I’m sure moody pregnant lady posts would get real boring and obnoxious after a while; I have gotten very good at whining- at least to myself!

Most recently we painted the Nursery- a pretty “pastel sage” color (okay it could pass for lime sherbet but we’ll just play along).  An old high school friend came up to visit and helped Hubby paint; actually he primed and painted- hubby just did a bit of touch up.  My old high school friend also brought up a number of things for us.  We now have an antique rocking chair- the seat of which I will recover.  Also there is a beautiful antique highchair- that is lacking only that little seat belt type strap.  Then there are also the two strollers, the manly diaper bag for hubby, the pile of clothes his friends pressed upon him to bring and a tiny porcelain trinket box with Katie’s first piece of jewelry- a dainty little signet ring.  Oh- and a few noisy toys (thanks!)

While my friend was here we discovered a great children’s consignment shop in Conway- in addition to the Yours Truly stores that are here- its called A kids Dream.  We got 7-8 outfits for $25.00, including some of THE cutest Tommy and Ralph Lauren dresses- things I would not be able to afford at their “new” prices.

We also got our first registry gifts delivered via UPS- the diaper bag I wanted- and the bouncy seat- both awesome and bound to be used frequently.

Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y  Y

I also heard late last week that my wonderful friend from college- who has experienced her own battle with infertility, finally got their “referral”- meaning that they have finally been assigned, for lack of a better word, a child to adopt from China; a beautiful baby girl, who is at this time 7 months old.  The baby was abandoned on the doorstep of a nursing home and taken to a local orphanage. Her name is Yue Mei Xue- I think that’s how it’ spelled- Yue (“last name”)is the name of Yugan (city she was found), Mei is beautiful, Xue is snow, on the day when she was admitted into the orphanage, it was snowing.  They plan on calling her Samantha and keeping Mei Xue as her middle name. Congrats to them- they have been waiting three years for this darling little girl. (see the blog “yearning for a child” in my blog roll for more about my friend)

results are in….

Amnio on tuesday….


I never knew tired before.

I am always tired.   Usually I wake up and lay in bed the last 15 minutes beforemy alarm clock goes off.  This morning my alarm clock woke me up.  I know I am supposed to be tired but, man- I’m really tired.  I also think I’m kind of a wuss.  I mean- sure Iwent through the whole IVF process, needles and all- but the morning sickness – not that I’ve even had a lot- and the tired all the time- I was not made for this.  I have a gut of steel (well mild steel maybe) and it has always been a point of pride that I can get by on 5 hours of sleep, in fact I do better with only 5, maybe 6, hours of sleep- but these things have been challenged, seriously.  Oh, and don’t get me started on concentration, and memory issues- a Friend of mine talked about “pregnant head” to explain some of her ditziness during her pregnancy.  I am now a believer.

On another note; I have not gotten around to looking for a pregnancy diary/organizer.  No idea if I prefer the more delineated “organizer” type or if I prefer the jornaling type. Hopefully I’ll get a chance to go peruse the isles of Barnes and Noble at some point.  Until then…

I promised a gambeson to Hubby- yet another gambeson.  The one I made most recently had a serious flaw- the outer shell fabric was completely the wrong fabric.  I have no idea how that happened.  I had thought it was a more “fine” fabric, but I just wanted to get the thing done and thought it was Hubby’s attempt at spiffing up his kit- but you just look at the thing sideways and the fabric tears.  SO-  Duvant Defender ( I may very well have butchered that) is Father’s day weekend, and I have- I think he said it was 11 days to get a new one made.  boy, I shot myself in the foot.

Prenatal testing

We broached the subject of prenatal testing this week.  Sometime in the next few weeks (June 10th) we will be having the Nucal Translucency scan with the accompanying blood work- where they measure, via ultrasound, the thickness of the back of peanut’s neck – at least that’s how I understand it (actually have found out that it measures the fluid in that area).  This measurement can help identify possible Downs Syndrome (or other chromosomal abnormalities)- the results are much more accurate if the blood work is done at the same time, although I haven’t really read up on it enough to know exactly what they are testing/looking for. 

I did some looking around online to see if I could find a “schedule” of prenatal testing but haven’t found anything that wraps it all up nicely for me.  I will probably have to print a list and then sit down with my sister who used to be a prenatal genetic counselor- I’m sure she could tell me exactly what is what and whether we should bother.   I came across some tests that really worry me- CVS for example- Chorionic Villus Sampling- where they take a sample of “stuff” (tiny villi- villus?) from the inside of the placenta- read as INVASIVE;carries a risk of miscarriage.  This test is akin to an amniocentesis- but can be performed much earlier.  Anyway- I think you get the point- its kind of freaking me out a little- especially since we have come so far just to get here.

And if we discovered  that this lil peanut was in fact a downs baby- I don’t think much would change.  I would be devastated at first- sad that our baby was not be 100% healthy in the terms that we are used to, but I would definitely start learning about raising a kid with downs before he/she came into the world and would be a proud parent regardless.  I don’t think hubby would have an easy time coming to terms with it.  But I understand men have a harder time with stuff like that.

Pregnancy diary

I have to admit: I have not started any kind of pregnancy diary.  I am not quite a quarter of the way through my pregnancy- so I still have some time but Iam stuck trying to decide if I should just keep a journal- in a blank book- or if Ishould buy a fancy pregnancy organizer/diary that will “lead” me through the process of journaling the events of my pregnancy.  On some leavel I would like to scrapbook the events- from all the fertility “crap” and the OB visits and some of the cards and e-mails I’ve gotten to all the physical manifestations, etc…  I also know that if I rely on this method of “historical documentation”- I will never have a record of my time as a pregnant woman!  Did any of you mom’s out there keep any kind of diary/record of your pregnancy?  and those of you who are expecting- do you or will your keep a diary of some kind??

came across this in a post and thought I would share 🙂

Show of your IVF baby in one of these….